Expectations are everywhere. We each have our own expectations and then we are subjected to the expectations of others. Expectations may be a necessary evil in some contexts like business, but are expectations really necessary in our personal lives? The answer is no. Expectations are a useful tool in business but are not so useful in your personal life. We cannot continuously think about our lives as a business. There does not need to be a sense of productivity and output. We need to collectively take a deep breath and let go.

I understand that this is easker said than done, especially since that as a society, we are focused on productivity and output. Productivity is how we measure ourselves against others. My opinion is that productivity is subjective and may differ from one person to another.

Expectations

Expectations are what cause negative emotions like anguish, disappointment, sadness, etc. When you envision something and form an expectation, you are setting yourself up to feel negative emotions. You open the door to disappointment. It is natural to have expectations but we all need to learn to deal with expectations in a way that mitigate the impact when something does not go as expected.

This is why having a preference is better than an expectation. Of course someone prefers to receive the right order when they order out, but mistakes happen and the wrong order may be delivered. Having a preference means that you will not take the experience so hard. You will not feel the loss of your intended meal as acutely. Additionally, having a preference over an expectation opens the door to happiness. Suppose the meal that was mis-delivered is not something you would have ordinarily ordered? As you try the food, you are unexpectedly delighted! The preference in this case means that the eating experience was not soured by any negative emotions such as anger or disappointment. There is an opportunity to be had within every experience. Choose to be optimistic and enjoy every moment. Do not let expectations rule your mind.

Letting Go

Letting go is a matter of perspective. The process of becoming detached is a hard process, one that requires discipline and perspective. You have to be able to see things as they really are, which is the hardest part of letting go. Letting go is an act that grounds and centers your mind in the present. Shedding expectations can be considered one of the ultimate acts of self-love. By removing expectations you open yourself to a world of opportunity.

Learning to let go is not something that can be done in an afternoon. It requires time and practice. Before you can let go, you first become aware of the attachment then is felt. Letting go is an act of surrender, which does not come easily to most. Letting go is a deeply personal process. You have to be aware of what your body is feeling in a moment of high stress. Does the body’s response(s) to stress serve you? Most likely not, and it will benefit you to notice your body in moments of high stress or in other times of intense emotion like disappointment and frustration.

Overall, expectations do not serve your best interest. It is time to let things go and to not only see but also let things be as they are.